Recovery Story Part 6
I’m at the live rugby game with my buddy Bob. I shouldn’t be here but the temptation is too much. I was given two tickets in a company box for this game, with free drinks and free food. Who could pass that up? Not me that’s for sure. It will be fine though I won’t have a lot to drink and I haven’t taken any drugs in a long time. By this, I mean today right? I won’t make my name mud. I will control my drinking. I will control myself. Things have been quite stressful lately, it is not easy coming out of the psychiatric ward with a Bipolar Disorder label around my neck.
The opposite of addiction is not sobriety. The opposite of addiction is connection. – Johann Hari
I am not supposed to be drinking or taking any drugs for a number of weeks because my psychiatrist wants to monitor me on my meds.0
I Blink And I Am Crying
He also thinks there is a possibility I have an alcohol and substance problem. He might have also mentioned something about the medication he put me on not mixing so nicely with things like alcohol and narcotics.
Well, I will prove him wrong. Things are going well. I am talking nicely with everyone and mingling. This is good. I blink and I am crying. Who is in front of me and what the fuck am I saying? How on earth did I go from being fine with one drink to suddenly being completely dronkverdriet? For those people that are not from South Africa, dronk verdriet is an Afrikaans term, directly translated it means drunken grief. You know those times when you get so pissed you cry and get all stupid and uncontrollable?
When You Make A Downright Tit Of Yourself?
Yeah well I am busy pulling one of those moves right now and it hit so quick I didn’t see it Coming. Bob is at my side and starts trying to manoeuvre me out of the room.
I know he is doing damage control and I know it is for my own good but still, I rage on while he drags me out. I don’t remember the walk out of the stadium. It is just like a DVD when you just skip a scene or two. Now I am lying on the road, tears are still streaming down my face and Bob is trying to lift me to my feet. I am seriously trying to stand up but my legs don’t work. I wonder if I have fallen down some stairs and broken my spine so I can’t feel my legs?
Nope they are still working, but just not with me, they are working against me. The thought of a new-born foal trying to stand up flies through my brain. I am saying something but I can’t even decipher the slurs. God that is bad. The rugby game must be finished because suddenly the street is full of people. They are stepping over me with looks of disgust. The DVD of my life does another skip and I am sitting in a truck with Bob.
Does Bob Have A Truck? Geez, Who Knew Right?
Suddenly I don’t feel so good. I don’t know what I ate or drank but it obviously didn’t mix so Well. I open the truck door and lean out to vomit. The bile comes flying out and my whole bodying lurches with the force of it. I lurch my ass right out of the truck face-first into my own vomit on the pavement far below.
My mind registers that I don’t feel any pain at all but I am literally seeing stars. My vision goes bright white and as I slip into oblivion I can’t understand how it all went so wrong.
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You can leave the rehab any time, no one will compel you to stay at the rehab. However, dedication and continued treatment are required to fight addiction and achieve a sober life.
There are various stages of addictions. The initial stage is the functioning individual with the addiction. The most common scenario is they have a job and their relationships are intact, but their health is depleting slowly because of their dependence.
Narcotic analgesics (painkillers) are drugs that can reduce pain, cause numbness and/ or induce a state of unconsciousness. They have the tendency to cause tolerance and addiction
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